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No, we're not talking about untalented black guys (well, not exclusively, at least). The Crappy Brother honors the shittier of two major league brothers, the shittier one of course playing for the Dodgers.



Sandy Alomar, Jr.

Sandy has made a name for himself by playing in the majors for thirty-seven years, but his brother Roberto was clearly the better ballplayer, hitting twice the number of home runs as his brother and posting a .300 career average.

Juan Bell

A top prospect, Juan never made it to the majors with the Dodgers. He ended up speding parts of 5 years in the big leagues, and batted .212. Juan's older brother George, however, posted solid numbers over 12 seasons, blasting 265 home runs in his career.

Ken Brett

George's older brother pitched in 30 games for the Dodgers in 1979. Ken pitched for 10 teams in 13 years, which doesn't speak too highly of him.

Jolbert Cabrera

Jolbert has been a sub-.200 hitter for most of his career (and it doesn't figure to change), while his brother Orlando has put up pretty good numbers thoughout his career—even knocking in 96 runs in 2001. Not only is Jolbert the crappier ballplayer, but he's got the crappier name, too.

Alex Cora

Yeah, Joey Cora was hardly a great player, but he did average .277 in 11 seasons. Alex seemed to improve with time, but it's doubtful he'll ever be the mediocre player his brother was.

Tripp Cromer

Tripp and D.T. Cromer. While neither may be a household name (not even in the Cromer household), it's pretty clear that Tripp was the crappier (and lighter) of the two. Tripp batted .250 in parts of three seasons with L.A., while D.T. has a .308 major league batting average, including 5 home runs in 57 ABs in 2001.

Jeremy Giambi

When your brother is Jason Giambi, it's a pretty good bet that you're going to be crappier than him, but Jeremy (who kwas with the Dodgers during Spring Training in '04) didn't even appear to be related. Brothers by blood, but a world of difference on the field. If Jeremy only shared his brothers love for steroids...

Wilton Guerrero

While Wilton isn't too bad with the bat, he's a goddamn idiot. In just a couple years with the Dodgers, he missed bases, corked his bat, and fielded like an old woman. Meanwhile, Vladimir Guerrero (who the Dodgers could have signed instead) seems headed to the Hall of Fame.

Chris Gwynn

Not only is Chris Gwynn Tony's crappy brother, but amazingly enough he's the fatter one too. Chris hung around the Dodgers for awhile, never getting much of a chance, but never doing much when he was given the opportunity. Meanwhile, Tony won 37 batting titles and secured his place as one of the greatest hitters ever.

Glenn Hoffman

As a player, manager, and coach, Glenn sucks. In his only year with the Dodgers as a player, he batted .220. Meanwhile, Trevor has been one of the best closers of the past decade, if not all time.

Wayne Kirby

Wayne did nothing to distinguish himself in parts of two seasons with the Dodgers, while his brother, Terry, has amassed solid numbers in 10 seasons as a NFL running back.

Mike Maddux

Mike, of course the crappy brother of Greg Maddux, was so crappy with the Dodgers that they had to get him twice. Mike ended up pitching for 10 teams in his career, coincidentally the same number of Cy Young awards that Greg won. The fact that Greg ended up spending a couple of months on the Dodgers does nothing to diminish his brother's mediocrity.

Ramon Martinez

OK, Ramon was hardly crappy (except when they got him back for Spring Training 2001), but to be fair, he was the crappier brother. The Dodgers had both Martinez brothers, but of course stuck with the wrong one.

Dick Nen

While Dick Nen's only hit as a Dodger was a big one in '63, his son had a slightly better career, distinguishing himself as one of the most successful closers of all-time.

Carlos Perez

Carlos's tumultuous 5-year career was far surpassed by brothers Melido and Pascual. Carlos won 40 games in the major leagues, with Melido winning 78 and Pascual winning 67. And not only was Carlos the crappier brother, he was the drunker one too.

Ron Roenicke

Ron, who played with the Dodgers from 1981-83, posted a .238 average in 8 major league seasons. His brother Gary, was far superior, posting an impressive .247 average.

Dave Sax

Well, in this case the Dodgers had the both the better brother and the crappy brother, but we can't miss a chance to mention Dave Sax, who scored three runs (none with the Dodgers) in parts of 5 major league seasons.

Butts Wagner

While Honus Wagner was one of baseball's greatest, his brother Butts was a real piece of shit... and of course played for the Dodgers (well, Brooklyn) in 1898. Butts had 38 at-bats and hit .237.

Jeff Weaver

Jeff went 27-24 in two seasons with the Dodgers, but after younger brother Jered began his career 9-0 with a 2.14 ERA, it's clear who the crappier brother is.

Todd Worrell

Until the late 90's, it could have easily been argued that Todd had a better career than his brother Tim. But despite Todd's 127 saves as a Dodger, he choked often, while Tim emerged as one of the best set-up men in the game.

> Did we forget someone? Send us your crappy brother below. (And Kip Gross is not Kevin Gross' brother.)

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